Saturday, 5 November 2011

With sadness in my heart

This past week has been one of the worst of my life, myself and my husband had news that one of our closest friends had died suddenly over the Halloween weekend.

Dunc was one of the nicest people anyone could ever have the pleasure of knowing, he will be missed by so many.
We got the news on Sunday morning but it didn’t sink in until Monday then I cried all day, I just couldn’t stop and didn’t think I ever would.
On Tuesday I decided (with encouragement from my wonderful husband) to paint my feelings on to canvas.
I am truly grateful that I was able to ‘paint it out’ and feel some mild relief for doing so.

A part of me felt like I needed to hold on to these paintings but deep down I know I don’t, those feelings at the time were raw and painful but have now changed into other feelings and I know I can let these go.

I have always tried to make my paintings personal in some way and have meaning to them rather than to be just a pretty picture, but these are the most emotional paintings I have ever painted, I hope you understand when I ask you to be gentle with your comments this week.

As well as the raw emotions that went into painting these girls, a lot of tears fell into the mix also, the girls are all named after the feelings I had whilst painting them.


In memory of Duncan Cartwright RIP sweet friend:



Sorrow:

Alone:

Remembering you:

At Peace:

Hollow:

No More Tomorrow's:

31 comments:

  1. I am so sorry for you. Loosing a loved one is never easy. It brings forth so many emotions and you have captured them in your art.
    Rest easy
    Nicole/Beadwright

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  2. I am so sorry for your loss, Micki! These sudden losses are often the worst! I'm glad you have your family and your art to help you heal and find your joy again! Your paintings are truly stunning!! Love and hugs, Silke

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  3. I am so sorry for your loss .... The art you created is beautiful, but more importantly, I guess it helped you a lot too. All the best for you and your husband.

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  4. Micki, I am so sorry for your loss. The beautiful work you created here in your grief is stunning. I am particularly moved by At Peace and just purchased it. I am glad you have moved through some of your original emotions, but we prepared for them to resurface as you process the loss of your dear friend.

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  5. Gorgeous paintings Micki and you have a very smart hubby ;o) You can feel all the depth of emotion in looking at them. They are really wonderful. I have to say, No More Tomorrows, and Sorrow are my favorites. All are absolutely gorgeous. I'm so sorry for your loss. xo Michele

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  6. I am so terribly sorry to hear this sweet girl! It is no surprise though, given the loss you are going through, that these pieces are nothing short of amazing. I am sure Duncan is smiling at the beautiful tribute you have made for him. I do hope the cuts of the deepest pain start to heal soon and that you can enjoy your memories of your dear friend. Sending you all my love. xxx

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  7. Oh Micki, So sorry to hear of your loss. My heart goes out to you and your family during this difficult time. I am happy to hear though that you were able to paint out your darkness. And I love each and every one of these pieces. I have been a fan of your work since I discovered you but I can say that I think these pieces are your best work yet. Amazing!

    Hope you can find some comfort in your memories.

    xo

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  8. Ive said it before, Art is a great healer, and these paintings have helped you come to terms with this wonderful man's loss. We all cope in different ways and these images show great heart and love x

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  9. I'm so sorry to hear of your sad loss Micki,the paintings you've produced here are nothing short of stunning.♥ I find the paintings 'Sorrow' and 'Hollow' are particularly poignant, such depth, such feeling.
    with love, Jess xx

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  10. Micki, loosing a close friend is very hard and heartbreaking. I can understand your feelings, and I am glad that you were able to show them in your paintings - it probably was the best that you could do for yourself (you have a very wise and loving husband). The girls are raw and show your feelings - and they are tremendously beautiful with such deep feeling.
    Sending you hugs across the ocean.

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  11. So sorry for your loss. But it did made you make some great paintings. Eventhough they are dark, not happy, every one of them is special.

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  12. I'm so sorry for your loss Micki :( Beautiful paintings as always♥

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  13. i'm so so sorry for your loss. the paintings are a beautiful tribute to your friend. i wish you nothing but comfort during this rough time. bless you. xoxo
    m.

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  14. oh Micki, I'm so so sorry for the loss of your friend. My heart goes out to all of you. I do also have to agree that these are some of your best paintings yet. The raw emotions are evident and man... these paintings just reach right out of the canvas to grab hold of the viewer. VERY beautiful, heartfelt and powerful. Again, I'm so sorry.

    xoEsther

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  15. I am so sorry to hear your sad news... may the angels protect you and sadness forget you. xxx

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  16. I am sorry for your loss and sadness. The paintings are really beautiful. Take care and hopefully your sadness will eventually transform into treasured memories of your friend.

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  17. What a beautiful tribute to your friend. So sad when you loose someone. I have lost two dear people this last week. Both were very ill. So hard when it is unexpected. Take time to heal. Work it through with your art.

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  18. thinking about you Micki (hugs). i hope you find a peace in your heart for your loved one.

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  19. I am so sorry for your loss Micki! The art you created in this sad time, was a beautiful tribute to your dear friend! Big Hugs!

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  20. So sorry Micki its very sad especially if he was young hope your pain heals soon your paintings are very beautiful when something like that happens it really puts a perspective on things God bless xxxxx

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  21. Oh Micki, I am so sorry to hear of your lose. I lost my Aunty unexpectedly not long ago and know exactly how you feel. My heart goes out to you.
    Your new paintings show your pain, but are great none the less. I'm glad you have a lovely husband. It helps, in times like this.
    May the happiness of family, particularly your kids, distract you from the pain in your heart.
    Sending you a ginormous virtual hug. Keep your chin up.
    Kyles xo

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  22. I am so sorry for your loss Micki. He looked like a nice and fun guy. Your paintings are full of heart and they are a beautiful expression to the loss you feel.

    A big hug and wishing you warm sunshine.

    ♥ Lisa

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  23. I'm very sorry for your loss, Micki. Big hugs, Silvia

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  24. I hope people are always gentle with the comments! Your paintings are exceptional, the depth of darkness and loss are fully expressed. They are direct and beautiful at the same time.
    HUGS
    Lorraine

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  25. I am so sorry for your loss. It is so hard to lose someone who means so much to you. Your paintings are beautiful... I hope painting can continue to help you through this.

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  26. That is so sad, Micki... :( I am truly sorry for your loss :(

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  27. Hi Micki
    I'm so sorry... But i'm so glad your hubby tols you to put your feelings on canvas :-) I can see so much sadness in them. Theyre beautiful! xoxoxoxo Donna

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  28. Art is such an extension of us...I'm so sorry to hear the news of your loss..and sorrow....

    ...the pieces you have created with it show your loving, beautiful soul...

    warmly,
    Cam

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  29. Dear Micki I feel so sad for you and your family right now, you must be feeling so much pain and shock. It will probably take time for you to come to terms with what has happened and it sounds like you have so much love around you which will help greatly. I'm sending you warm hugs and deepest condolances...I wish we lived even closer than we do already coz I'd be round to yours with 'real hugs' like a shot.
    These paintings are so beautiful Micki and like all of your friends here have said they're a Wonderful Tribute to your friend Duncan. Much love and warm hugs from me to you xx love jo xx

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  30. Beautiful paintings, true Art heals.So sorry for the loss of youre friend sending hugs.

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  31. Mikki........i'm so deeply sorry for your loss. I've only just read this. I'm glad your art is helping you work through your grief. Stay stong Micki xxx Sarah Waterfield

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I love to hear your thoughts on my work, your comments make me smile :o)